To love someone deeply gives you strength
by csinyfsan
Summary: This is a story I keeped for a very long time and I wasn't so sure to publish it here. But well... The story is set at the season finale 4x23 and is about Louie, Matt and Gabby, hope you'll like it.


Casey POV:

I've done so much wrong lately, the relationship with Dawson has fallen apart, again. And like the last time it was all my fault I've hadn't the power to fight and this is the result. She straightened up again after the hard time we've been through, but I'm so stubborn that I'm not in the position to let the past behind. The loss of our child has been gnawing at my substance and I didn't noticed it. I always thought that I'm the one that must be strong but during this I've lost a piece of myself. I built up a wall with the hope that now no pain will get to me again but the pain came through. In the evenings, where Gabby is now no longer her in the apartment I have a lot of time to think especially about our lost. I wanted kids my whole life and within a second my dreams disintegrated and I guess from this moment on, we have distanced ourselves. Probably it was because I wasn't honest or maybe the job was in the way again, I can't explain it. But about one thing I'm sure we can't go on like this any longer ignoring the fact that we love each other deep inside us. It's time to act, I've crawled into my shell long enough now it's time for the future…

The first thing that is on my list is the call Susan Weller to inform her that I'm not going with her to this betterment for Alderman I have better ideas. Antonio was right as he told me that I always talk but not doing anything. A year ago I asked Gabby to marry me but after that we only had theoretical thoughts about our wedding but none of us wanted to do it with the entire heart. I'm going to dare the step and I already know how…

Dawson POV:

It was a hard time, especially a hard year, first the near death experience in the storehouse and then I found out that I was pregnant. After the whole bad things with Jack Nesbitt our life seems to be on the right way. We were back together and expected our little gift of heaven. But this damn God above us thought that it would be nice to put some stones onto our way. And we lost our child, well this was really a game changing situation. I always thought I would never survive this but Matt was always my roar of the surf and when I felt bad he was there. But at this time we drifted apart and now I'm alone again. I know that it is also due to that I have artificially drained him to run as Alderman. But I knew that he is the right one for this even if it cost my relationship. I admit that I didn't have to so hard to him…

But I don't want to think about this I have a new goal to focus on, this little guy Louie changed everything. From the first moment on he got into my heart. The perception of being his new mother has taken me and I'm ready to fight. And fortunately I have all my friend on my side they are so helpful. Herrmann was the one that offered me the apartment and promised me to help with everything. Now we are her with the reinforcement of Firehouse 51 and clean up the apartment. Cindy and Mouch started to clean up the living room while Severide, Herrmann and I set up some furniture's in Louie's new room. The walls are painted in a light blue and above his firetruck bed is the logo of the Chicago Fire Department. On the opposite side of the room I painted Louie and me together with some balloons. It looks a bit childish but I hope this shows him that from now on he has a new stability in life. Nothing in this world would separate me from this little boy, but first the inspector need to see that this apartment is a good home for a child. Therefore I can't embroil myself in deep thought I need to focus on my goal and until I reach this there is a long way to go. The apartment is very dirty and the water tap in the kitchen isn't working but no one of the guys is a plumber, the only person I know that can fix it is Matt. And with all this silly disputes between us I don't want to phone him and ask him for a favor. I'm locked in tight…

Casey POV:

Herrmann called some minutes ago that he needs help with Gabby's new apartment at first I was a little disappointed. But in fact it doesn't surprised me, Gabby had said that she wanted to do this on her on and when something got into her mind nobody can change her opinion. But I want to help also I can tell the guys there, about my plan, so I packed some of my tools and grab my suit and left my flat. Today I will implement my plan, Chaplain Orlovsky is inaugurated and will met us at the Academy at 5pm. Until then the inspector was there and had chanced on everything on the new apartment. As I arrived there a saw that there is enough to do, but I wouldn't want to do anything against Gabby's sake so I went directly into the child room. As Herrmann sad to me that Dawson is there with Severide. As I entered the room I was a little bit scared what if she don't want to see me and the whole plan falls apart. But I can't think about it for now I have to stand up and be a man.

Dawson POV:

I turned around and faced Matt he looked a bit scared which made me a little nervous, he was always the strong one and now he looks like that he is torn apart. I wanted to ask him why he is here but as I opened up my mouth he put up his finger sent Kelly out of the room and started to talk: "I've done so much wrong in the recent years. So often I have hurt you and mostly I didn't even noticed. I wasn't the man that you've wanted and therefore I want to say sorry. I know that a simple apology isn't enough to bring us together. Especially after all that happened last year but I want you to now that I still love you. You will always be my soulmate even if you are not ready to forgive me. But if you are ready I'm here, we spend too much time separated from each other. As you said that you want to be Louie's foster mother I couldn't say what I feel because I even didn't know. But after some nights of thinking I know what prevented me that day. I was scared that we won't arrive this aim, like the last time with our baby. And then I realized that failing is a part of our live but after this we have to stand up again. This is why I'm here I want to go through this with you I want to be back with you, please!"

I was irritated I had resigned myself to go through this on my own and now Matt stands in front of me tears rolling down his check and I don't know what to do or to say. For sure I still love him but who gives me the pledge that we wouldn't fall apart again. But on the other hand, there is no life without risks so why I shouldn't try it? I sigh and lean over to Matt and wipe the tears away with my thumb and whisper into his ear: "If you manage it to repair the water tap in the kitchen I may think about a date later this day!" As l leaned back to watch his face I see the old Matt within him and he tells me: "Believe me I will do it so strike every meeting for tonight, because the both of us are going out for a date."

The rest of the day passed quickly so after the inspector checked everything in the apartment and assured Gabby that he would report soon we went out to our "date". While the day I have told everyone about my plan for the wedding. So everyone knows about it except of Gabby bit she will soon learn about it.

Casey POV:

As I parked my car on the other street side near the Academy Gabby looked over to me a bit confused. But I'm not going to tell her what's going on. I just give her a short kiss and handed her into Brett's and Kidd's hands they will know what to do.

I stood in front the water tower between Severide my best man and Chaplain Orlovsky which will wed Gabby and me. I'm a bit nervous what if Gabby isn't ready for the step and I will stand here alone and humiliated. I kept moving my hands nervously until Severide reached over and said: "Man, relax, she will come!" I just shook the head and said: "What if it was all too much for her, well I rushed in it. And maybe she isn't ready for this step, maybe…" I came not further because I saw her, Gabby, the love of my life walking down the aisle with Antonio. She looks so beautiful in her white dress, it matches so well with her darker skin. First I was a bit insecure about this dress, I knew that Shay and Gabby loved it from the first moment on, but science then more than one year have passed. But now I have no more time to think about this because Antonio and Gabby reach the end of the aisle. And Antonio handed me the arm of his sister and whispered into my ear: "Don't screw it up, otherwise I have to kill you." I nodded and turned to Gabby then and said: "You look stunning in this dress!" She just smiled and we turned to face the Chaplain as he started to talk: "Married couples owe each other true-openheartedness, aid and assistance. It is their duty to give the other what the one needs, like the moment when you have to serve a hand to seek support or to give support. A handshake or a holding hand is important for staying together, through thick and thin, for better and for worse, in happy and in sad times. Also on the dark day when a holding hand isn't enough a married couple has to stand together especially because of the danger the both of you face every day.

Matthew Elias Casey, do you solemnly declare to take Gabriela Sophia Dawson as your wife and do you vow to fulfill all obligations, which are connected by law in matrimony?" "Yes, I do!"

Gabriela Sophia Dawson, do you solemnly declare to take Matthew Elias Casey as your husband and do you vow to fulfill all obligations, which are connected by law in matrimony?" Gabby looked over to Matt the love of her life, after all the hard time it was now the term for a decision: "Yes, I do!"

"Then I hereby declare, as a registrar of the municipality of Chicago, in the name of the law your marriage sealed. You may kiss the bride." The couple finally kissed deeply and walked down the aisle passing all their colleagues and friends of the firehouse.

After all congratulated them they finally had some seconds on there on. Gabby couldn't wait any longer: "You are crazy but in a positive way. I can't think of any man who would do this to his girlfriend therefore I love you." She leaned over into a deep kiss but there wasn't a long time for this because Gabby's phone starts to ring. She took of and…

From this moment on we are a family living together in this little apartment. But we are happy with this just Louie, Gabby and me!


End file.
